Magic Spells and Tribute To Barbarians

Blog: DC government will pay criminals not to commit crimes:

Our nations capital has decided that some sort of a program that pays some people not to commit crime is a good thing to try. The linked article likens it to the ancient practice of paying off barbarians to not attack your city ... paying "protection money" to the Mob might be an even better example.

The part about things like this that always impresses me is the general liberal government idea that economic incentives are a sort of black magic spell that if the proper incantations are used, can accomplish anything you like.

Thus, raising taxes on cigarettes is a proven way to reduce consumption, where taxing corporations at the highest levels in the world is not supposed to act as an incentive for them to keep profits off-shore, or even move to a less onerous tax climate as many have done.

Providing all manner of subsidies for not working we are assured has no effect on anyone trying to get a job  -- raising taxes on working people has no disincentive effect. It is all in the incantation!

One can envision a DC social worker meeting with a "client"....

Social Worker: "Bob, thanks for coming in, we need to go over your yearly benefits package. I see here that you are an able 35 year old presently unemployed, is that still the case?"

Bob: "Yes, it is, but I'm looking real hard for a job!"

Social Worker: "I understand completely! We raised the minimum wage to $15 an hour, require all employers to provide two weeks paid vacation, 6 weeks of family leave, health benefits, free child care and provide a federally mandated and tracked worker advisory group that meets 1 hour a week on the clock to give employees a voice in the business, yet hiring has gone DOWN!" We are doing all we can do, and I understand you are as well! It is often difficult to understand the job market!

We will continue to provide your subsidized apartment, cell phone, internet and cable TV along with $400 a month in Food Stamps and $1,000 a month in federal support payment.

I see here you have a criminal record.

Bob: "I was framed".

Social Worker: "No doubt racially motivated! This year we have a new program where you can receive up to $9,000 a year for attending a couple of classes if you promise to not commit any violent offenses during the year."

Bob: "I dunno, my schedule is pretty busy ... how much class we talkin here, I never did like school much!

Social Worker: "Couple of hours, very flexible schedule,  ... no tests. We understand that you have a life, and that takes priority with us! "

Bob: "I guess I could maybe do that ... so, if I would be framed again, would I have to give the money back?"

Social Worker: "Not if you spend it directly -- not a good plan to build up any savings account or anything, I'm sure you are avoiding that."

Bob: "Yeah, I like to keep any extra funds stashed in weed, whiskey or bling if you catch my drift.!"

Social Worker: "Thanks for stopping by Bob. Be sure to call me if you have any problems ... oh, I almost forgot. This is an election year. If you would like to vote in November, we can pick you up, and there is normally a small token of appreciation for our clients, OR, if you would rather, you can sign your absentee form here today and we can handle it for you.

Bob: "Say, two years ago I got a couple bottles of Malt and a carton of smokes!".

Social Worker: "Bob, I'm sure that was a gift from an appreciative campaign worker on the bus! There is no reason that you can't sign your absentee here today and still help out with the fall vote -- there is no identification required at the polls, and I'm sure there will be appreciation from the campaigns again in the fall.

We do have a program where I can provide you a Hillary button that has a small sticker on the back which many of the liquor stores in the area are providing a VERY significant one time discount on if you catch my drift".

Bob: "Yeah, I'll sign it ... the rich guys have it all rigged, I'm glad to see that we are getting a little something for all the work we do! .... See ya round Dawwwg !

Social Worker: "Thanks again Bob"


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